My Underachieving Seatmate Doesn't Need Any Comforting

Only one person was left writing in his heirloom diary for three. And this person who persisted in writing could only write these few words—to this day, you can feel her heart wrenching pain in every line and stroke.

He Shen did not know how to comfort Qiao Shao.

He had never known the warmth of a normal family. It was difficult to imagine how happy Qiao Shao’s previous family had been. You can’t miss what you didn’t have. But to have it and then lose it forever, that kind of pain simply couldn’t be described in words.

Qiao Shao was crying fiercely, until he was left gasping for breath. It was as if all that pain he’d been suppressing for five years was all draining out.

When he first returned home, he didn’t shed a tear. During the two years that he was receiving treatment, he didn’t cry. After his mother died, he cried silently and then forgot everything.

Now he was remembering bit by bit. The tears that had been suppressed for a long time broke through the shackles of his heart, and all flowing came out.

He Shen felt so distressed that he didn’t know what to do. He hugged him and comforted him. Small kisses fell on the top of his head, his eyes, his brow and his wet cheeks.

Qiao Shao kept on crying, like a newborn child, crying until he was a complete mess.

After an unknown length of time, Qiao Shao cried himself hoarse and his tears gradually petered out.

He Shen looked at him and said, “She wouldn’t want to see you so sad.”

Qiao Shao’s eyes were wet but he didn’t try to run away. He forcefully wiped his eyes and said, “Help me, okay?”

He Shen stared blankly.

Qiao Shao’s hands shook terribly. Staring at the diary, he said, “Help me turn the pages. I want to finish reading it.”

This was the year that he couldn’t ever face. He had forgotten what he had gone through and he hadn’t been ready to think about what she had.

And now that everything was laid out in front of him, he wanted to see.

He wanted to see himself and see her as well.

He Shen’s insides twisted painfully. “Maybe you should wait until later ...”

Qiao Shao shook his head and said, “Now, I must &#k2013; must see it.”

He Shen paused and said, “Okay.”

He stretched out his hand, as though he were touching a burning hot iron, he turned it page by page, this diary filled with the tears of a desperate mother.

Three months later, the contents of the diary gradually increased.

Although it was still only her writing on the page, she filled the entire piece of paper. Bit by bit, she started to record what happened at home. Using the calm tone of a narrator, she wrote down everything that she’d seen.

This wasn’t like a diary, but more like letters; letters to her missing son.

Qiao Shao read through it without missing a single word. At this moment, it was like he had returned home, as if he was by her side, as if he had never left.

An indescribable force filled his chest, and he felt a hand behind him gently pushing him forward, pushing him from the endless darkness into the dazzling light.

The warmth spread all over the body, Qiao Shao turned back and saw his mother’s gentle smile.

Qiao Shao looked unblinkingly at him. In a choked voice, he said, “I’m sorry.”

He remembered. He remembered everything.

He Shen’s voice almost cracked. “Qiao Shao!”

Qiao Zongmin, who had been hiding behind the door, strode in and took the unconscious Qiao Shao into his arms.

He Shen urgently said, “Uncle, Qiao Shao, he ...”

Qiao Zongmin’s eyes were reddened and his voice was low and hoarse, “I’ve already called the doctor.”

He Shen sighed in relief. He threw all other thoughts to the back of his mind and joined him in going out.

The doctor examined Qiao Shao’s condition and said, “It’s nothing serious. He’s just worn himself out and needs to rest well.”

Both men in the room were relieved.

Qiao Shao was in a coma. Qiao Zongmin and He Shen said nothing. The two remained by his bedside, standing there for the entire night.

Qiao Shao had a dream, a dream of the truth.

The weather was very good that day. It was like April or May weather. He had followed his parents to the Shen Hai Building. He had gotten bored waiting inside and had run out to play.

In the shadows, he saw a gentle-looking woman.

He asked her, “What are you looking for?”

The woman’s eyes lit up when she saw him and her voice was soft and gentle. “Child, auntie can’t see very well. Can you help me and lead the way?”

Little Qiao Yi looked up at her. The woman’s loose flaxen hair was tucked behind her ears. She looked a bit like his mother. For this reason, Qiao Yi had a good impression of her. “Okay, should I send you home?”

The woman said warmly, “My house is very close. Will you take me back?”

Little Qiao Yi immediately said, “En, no problem!”

The woman held out her hand. Her fingertips trembled slightly. She said, “Can you hold my hand?”

Little Qiao Yi graciously took her hand and said, “Don’t worry, I will definitely take you home.”

“Thank you,” the woman thanked him sincerely. “Thank you. You’re such a good boy.”

Then a strange scent suddenly wafted towards Little Qiao Yi and he fainted.

Qiao Shao woke up in a cold sweat and He Shen was by his bedside. “Are you all right?”

Qiao Shao shuddered. “Dad ...”

Qiao Zongmin said, “I’m here!”

Qiao Shao looked up at him, his eyes quivering, and he said, “I remember ...” He remembered it all.

That year, Qiao Shao was held in Guangxia District, only 500 meters away from Shen Hai Building.

The woman had locked him in an abandoned room in an underground parking lot and spent a whole year with him.

It was a room lighted only by a single incandescent lamp. It had nothing but the simplest furniture. At first, the woman coaxed him gently. When she was met with Qiao Shao’s fierce resistance, she put on shackles on his feet, completely imprisoning him in that room.

It was very quiet inside the room. No sound from the outside world could get in. There was only that woman’s ceaseless voice.

She told him, “Xiao Bao, I am your mother.”

She kept saying to him, “Mom has been looking for you.”

She was almost brainwashing him. “Mom has finally found you.”

One day, two days, three days ... She only used the simplest food to keep the two of them alive.

Qiao Shao had struggled, had tried so hard, had tried to escape. But she followed him closely, staring at him even when he slept, fearing that he might disappear in the blink of an eye.

This kind of life lasted for a whole year. Because the woman never left the room, there weren’t any clues to be found.

The world was so big, but it was also so small.

Because this tiny space had been completely cut off from the outside world, it became a mysterious place that no one could find.

A year later, all the food and water the woman had prepared were used up. She starved to death. She refused to leave Qiao Shao even until the end. She gave Qiao Shao all the food until she died.

Qiao Shao stumbled out of that underground room, relying on his desire to live and his last bit of instinct to return to Shen Hai building.

Then he saw his own mother.

When Yang Yun hugged him tightly and said that phrase “Mom has finally found you”, Qiao Shao’s spirit collapsed completely. He struggled frantically, like he had seen a ghost. He ran from his mother’s arms and wouldn’t let her near him again.

Until his mom died due to illness ...

After two years of therapy, Qiao Shao had barely broken free from his nightmare only to forever lose his beloved mother. Under that heavy blow and because of deep self-blame, he forgot everything.

Regardless whether it was pain or happiness, whether it was a nightmare or a sweet dream, he had forgotten it all.

After telling him everything, Qiao Shao looked at his father, his eyes were red and swollen. “I’m sorry ...”

Qiao Zongmin held his son in his arms. The emotions he too had been suppressing for several years all flowed out. “She loves you. Until the last moment of her life, she was still thinking of you.”

Translator’s note: Short chapter is short.